Moving Abroad as a Black Gay Man: What I Wish I Knew
Me - Nick Guillory on the beach in Puerto Vallarta
September 2024… I was living in New York City and made 5 years. I was worn down and beat down and ready to go — ready for a change I have always dreamt about. Living abroad. No, Trump didn’t run me off. I ran off before that mess. But now that the country is causing chaos, it’s not lost on me that I made the right decision. Its really sad what’s going on. But I am grateful that I was able to get away.
I moved in September and arrived into Puerto Vallarta not really knowing what I was getting myself into. But ready for a change none the less. I had been here before so I sorta knew what to expect. I would recommend you visit any place you’re considering moving to before moving. I am seeing a lot of young folks move places, that they had never visited before, then result in trash talking the country. Well, sweetie, you should have visited and done your research first!
Before I got here, I had my friend tour the apartment I was considering and he gave his blessing. I was like okay, holy sh*t — its happening. I signed a lease, and it was on. I got my one-way ticket out of the city and headed south to Vallarta.
Once I arrived, it was my turn to figure things out. Meet new people. SCARY. My goodness I don’t know about y’all but I have social anxiety now days. I can’t stand small talk sometimes. And, I hate when I am forced into awkward situations with people. But alas, I moved to a new place so I needed to meet new people. I wound up going to a happy hour that was hosted by some other Americans in town and I met one person that I connected with and we hung out — till he LEFT ME! LOL! But all good, that forced me to meet other people. I knew a few folks, in town already, too.
So, that’s the first thing you have to work on when you move somewhere else, right? It’s building community. A good way to connect with new people, I found, was Facebook groups and communities. They are going to be your best friend!
Next, I needed to figure out FOOD. Shelter, community, and food are probably my most important things I need. I bounced from La Cormier to Wal Mart to Ley to Soriana when I first moved here — to figure out what I’d like the best. I wound up really liking Costco. I had never been a member before but I joined and I think it was like $70 for the year. Which is so worth it! I love their selection of meats and certain produce and it really helps with my dieting, that I try to adhere to.
Once I figured out where to eat, I was good. A big boy like me does NOT like to go unfed. LOL! The community piece was already sort of done for me, since I knew people here. I was able to re-connect with them and I still hang out with many of them today. Although, I probably could do more in that department, I’m letting those sorts of things happen more naturally and organically now days. I don’t want to FORCE anything.
But ultimately, these are all things I’ve learned AFTER moving. I really wish I would have had some sort of guidebook or something but I really just up and left and did it all my self. That’s why I wanted to start this blog. I wanted to start talking more about the REAL REAL … not the fake romanticized elements of living and traveling abroad. Especially, the solo stuff. Because I am hoping to use my journey to encourage more people and Gay Black men to take it to the air and start traveling more. It’ll really change your life!
If you’re interested in learning more about making your dreams abroad a reality, let’s talk. I’m slowly rolling out consultations. Please feel free to email me @ nick@nickguillory.com, and let’s set up a time to connect. I can’t wait to connect and meet more of y’all! xx